A Death in the Family

Our oldest grandson died on February 1, 2010 of military related causes. Since that time, the Squire and I have attended twenty-five funerals or viewings. Not all family - I don't have that many relatives! - but we have lived and gone to church here for almost forty years and our friendships go deep.

I lost my sister to ALS, my mom to simple old age, and an uncle to the same sort of brain tumor that killed my dad in 1999. The Squire has lost both his mother and his stepmother, and several aunt and uncles. Three friends have been widowed, our vet (and dear friend) had a heart attack, a lady at church lost a long and courageous battle against cancer. Wednesday I attended the service for a member of the DBE (Daughters of the British Empire) and today we went to a viewing for an old friend.

Edna worked with both the Squire and me at the old Equitable Trust Bank, and her nephew was my sister's first husband. They met at a family reunion, so there was another connection there, too.

I just hope this two year anniversary brings us a bit of a respite. We're running out of people to bury!

My dad really was late to his own funeral. The person who drove the hearse had grown up in Bel Air, but moved away. I had handed out printed directions to Christ Church, but the driver disregarded them, turning onto the old road instead of staying on the main highway. Bel Air had undergone some tremendous changes, with new roads and traffic patterns, which was why I had made up maps to get to the church. They pulled into St. Mary's, but the parking lot was empty, so the hearse, and my mom and sister following in the limo, pulled into every church along the road.

In the meantime, we had no idea what was going on - this was pre-cell phone and GPS - and I kept getting out of my seat and going to peer out the church door. Back to my pew and then another circle around the church. Finally, the rector told me to please sit down. "I promise you we won't start until he gets here."

It was a good thing his funeral wasn't on a Saturday. The way things run on my family, there'd have been a wedding at St. Mary's, and they'd have ended up dragging my dad down the aisle behind the bride!